Category: Blog

I am really looking forward to the ‘Women Raising Millions Training Program’ that I am attending next week in San Francisco, an interactive program designed to propel fundraisers to the next meeting. The trainers have generously agreed that I can update this blog (with the proper references of course) with some of the tips, techniques and knowledge that I will gain from this course.

One of our pre-assignments has been to write a personal introduction to other participants on ‘the one thing’ that has influenced me to be where I am today. Now that really got me thinking, ‘Why do I do what I do?’ My introduction to my fellow participants is below. Let me know your thoughts?

‘Mummy why do you have to prepare food for Daddy’?
‘Sisi, can you come and help me? Mummy, I am reading my book’.
‘Ei Sisi! One day you will allow someone to insult me (direct translation from Akan into English)’ in response to my persistent lack of interest in cooking.

As a child I was aware (probably on an unconscious level) of the differences between men and women. One of my clearest memories is of my Mum complaining that she would have to prepare food for my Dad very late in the day…My Dad worked in the civil service and after work would play squash with his friends. After squash, Dad would have a couple of beers and peanuts with his friends at the Officer’s Mess near the squash court where they played. On his way home Daddy would often stop to purchase Kenkey and Fish (a staple Ghanaian dish) sold by the roadside for his dinner. Mummy would be responsible for ensuring there was fresh pepper to accompany the meal, the table was set and would have to sit by my Dad whilst he ate. Dinner for Dad would usually be anytime between 10pm and 11pm.

Now the one thing that I did not understand was why my Mum would complain about having to prepare (or serve) dinner so late. I used to think ‘Why are you doing this if you don’t want to’. I remember saying to my Dad ‘When I get married I won’t cook for my husband’. So how has all of this led me to where I am today? I felt a sense of injustice in female – male relations and it was only after reading the works of feminists such as bell hooks that I understood why my Mum would have to prepare dinner for my Dad and why my Dad expected my Mum to do so…

I passionately believe that we can live in a world where women’s rights and women’s bodies are held sacrosanct. I passionately believe that we can live in a world where women and men co-exist in peace. I passionately believe that we can live in a world where women and men share housework and care-work. Working to create such a world is the reason why I work today for the African Women’s Development Fund, a grant-making foundation for African women which provides financial, technical and capacity building assistance to African women’s organisations.

Nana Sekyiamah
Programme Officer
Fundraising & Communications
African Women’s Development Fund

I love salsa dancing and last Sunday went to my local salsa joint accompanied by my friends Kamau and Francis. During the week we met up at our local drinking spot Zars Zars, and somehow the conversation turned to salsa which gave me the opportunity to propound one of my strange theories on how salsa demonstrates the challenges of male – female relationships.

Kamau remarked, ‘Nana you are such a good dancer’ and my response was ‘Thanks but I’m really not that great a dancer’. You are probably thinking that when someone pays you a compliment you should just say ‘Thank you’ and leave it there…you’re right but I had to elaborate and explain that the way I dance salsa and how well I dance depends on my male partner.

Salsa is generally a male dominated dance with the male leading and determining the style in which the woman and the man will dance. The man has to guide the woman with his hands, body and movements whilst the female has to be very intuitive and follow the lead of the man. When you are dancing with a ‘good’ male dancer, salsa can be so much fun. He takes his time for you to both get into the rhythm and almost ‘assesses’ (silently of course) your level of dancing so he will definitely not try and do a triple spin, dip and some other complicated move when you are only a beginner. Alas I wish I could say all men were like that! There are some men that the minute you begin dancing with you want to yell ‘Stop! This is not an acrobatic show, just take it easy’. There are also other men who simply do not know how to lead, you cannot tell whether they want you to turn left, spin or even do a basic step.

So how does this relate to male – female relationships? In my humble experience, the majority of men on the salsa scene are not brilliant dancers and when you are salsa’ing with someone who is not that good then your dance will not be the beautiful work of art that it could potentially be. Good male dancers know to fall into their partner’s rhythm and allow the women to shine rather than make the dance all about the man showing off his skills. Good male salsa dancers listen to the beat of the music and dance accordingly…they do not move to their own rhythm. Actually the best salsa dances I have had ended up as a partnership rather than the male leading and me following.

So what do the other salsa fans think? See you on the dance floor

Nana Sekyiamah
Programme Officer
Fundraising & Communications

Yesterday, several of my colleagues and I attended the opening ceremony of AMwA’s Regional African Women’s Leadership Institute (AWLI) held in Ghana. The theme for this AWLI was ‘African Women’s Leadership and gender responsive poverty reduction strategies’ and the keynote speaker was the Honourable Hajia Alima Mahama. Now those of you who read my blogs know that I was rather excited about the possibility of Ghana’s first woman vice president and Hajia Mahama had been the woman most cited as being likely to fill that post. For those of you who follow politics in Ghana you will know that Hajia was not chosen as the NPP’s Vice Presidential nominee but the post went to the deputy governor of the Bank of Ghana, a man whose name I don’t even know or remember…prior to his nomination and rumours of his nomination about a week ago the deputy governor was a complete unknown in Ghanaian political circles so the question that was on my lips the entire time Hajia gave her keynote address was ‘How does she feel about not being picked as the Vice-President nominee for the NPP?’ and that was the question I posed in the Q&A session that followed. I have to confess, I did ask myself ‘is this a wise question to ask, after all it is an extremely political question and maybe this is not the right forum during which to pose the question’, but I thought ‘when else am I going to get this opportunity, and surely this is topical at the opening ceremony of a leadership institute which is grooming women to attain positions of leadership in all sectors of society’. So I posed a question and I got an answer which was simple and felt heartfelt. Hajia’s response which I am paraphrasing was ‘I felt disappointed, I had been one of the forerunners for the last few months and in the end I get told that Ghana is not ready for a woman Vice-President’. Part of what was really nice about the entire event was not only that Hajia answered questions openly and honestly but that she was there for the entire event including cocktails afterwards. It was good to interact with the staff of AMwA and put faces to emails as well as meeting some of the promising women taking part in this year’s AWLI.

The other highlight of AWwA’a opening ceremony was also the honouring of 3 Ghanaian women for their leadership and contribution to changing the lives of their communities. The awardees were Abigail Burgesson, Senior Manager, Special Programs at AWDF, Angela Dwamena-Aboagye, Executive Director of The Ark Foundation and Gladys Asmah, Minister for the Ministry for Fisheries who was also the very first Minister for the Ministry of Women and Children in Ghana. Congratulations to all awardees!!!

Nana Sekyiamah
Programme Officer
Fundraising & Communications

One of the most popular sessions at the International Aids Conference was probably the session on male circumcision (MC). The session room was so full that many of us had to go into the overflow room and watch the panel discussion on large TV screens. I was very suprised on several accounts. For one, male circumcision is very common in Ghana where boys are circumcised at a very young age, usually in hospital whilst still babies and secondly I had no idea male circumcision was being touted as potential prevention to HIV. My curiousity on Male Circumcision and HIV/AIDS had initially been aroused during the satellite session held by the International AIDS Womens Caucus when some women expressed dissatisfaction with the promotion of Male Circumcision so I thought I would go along to the session to find out some more. As usual, I will outline what the key messages by the different speakers were.

Alvaro Bermego from the UK gave an overview of the main issues including what is known, what is unknown and some challenges where male circumcision is concerned.

What we know:

* Prevalence of HIV in African is lower in countries where a prevalence of MC is greater than 80%.

* Risk of acquiring HIV is higher immediately post MC.

* Promotion of MC has started in Southern African communities with length waiting lists of people wanting MC.

* No direct protection for women from MC

What we don’t know:

* Impact of large scale roll out of MC on HIV prevalence

* Whether increased risky behaviour may negate benefits of MC

* As surgery is non-reversible could it affect novel techniques in future that may be developed?

Challenges:

* Safety – adult MC can cause psychological and medical problems

* Will circumcised men be more likely to blame women if they become HIV positive?

* Many people believe it will cause a reduction in sexual sensation – although Alvaro has not seen any conclusive results to support this

* Interests/Resources behind MC is being pushed as a scientific medical bullet because the desired results haven’t been attained from microbicides.

The second speaker Mogomotsi Supreme Mafalapitsai from South African spoke about the need for gender analysis and clear communication plans to disseminate information on MC as well as the need for MC to be integrated into existing preventation systems. Mafalapitsai also pointed out some of the cultural/religious aspects of MC including the belief in some Southern African cultures that circumcised men are weak. Some implication for MC affecting women oulined by Mafalapitsai include:

* Women being blamed and seen as carriers of HIV
* Resumption of sex prior to healing puts women at increased risk of HIV
* Women have the burden of caring for circumcised men
* HIV positive men are discriminated against as unable to understake MC due to compromised immune systems

A feminist perspective on MC was provided by Marge Berer who emphasised that partners of men have a right to protection and that MC is the only preventative method that does not protect men and women. Some of the arguments made by Berer included:

* MC as a preventative method would only work if there is a 75% prevalence rate which can take years to achieve. (In the Q&A session, a representative from UNAIDS Kate {didn’t catch her surname)said that the prevalence rate could be as low as 30%)

* MC is useless for HIV positive men and untested men whether circumcised or not

* Are men going to be circumcised indiscriminately?

* MC is only 50-60% effective, less suitable options cuch as MC are being identified as there have been so few solutions. Imagine a condom that is 40% ineffective?

* Who was consulted before MC programmes began? Were HIV positive people and women consulted?

Berer went on to ouline the following proposals about involving women in MC:

* Women need to be involved as partners including information for couples counselling

* Women need to be consulted on policy levels with more funding targeted towards grassroots organisations and women.

Berer ended her session by saying

‘ The snip alone won’t do it, there must be a link between the penis and the brains’ whilst calling for the Pleasure Project to open an office in every country.

I have just googled the Pleasure Project. Let me know your thoughts on male circumcision, the pleasure project and female condoms (my latest acquisition from AIDS 2008)

Nana Sekyiamah
Programme Officer
Fundraising & Communications

I had dreams of blogging every day from Mexico with updates of the latest news from the International Aids Conference. I was going to be the Carrie Bradshaw of the development world and at the end of the night sit on my bed and blog away on my laptop. Well, those dreams have been thwarted! First of all I arrive very late on the 2nd of August so decide to lug my laptop to the conference venue alongside my usual ‘suitcase’ (that’s what my friends and perhaps my enemies call my usual handbags, well you never know when you might need a good book, a notebook, a sanitiser.) I reckon that since the world world is ‘wi-fi’d’ I will at the appropriate time find a nice café, order a herbal tea and blog. Anyway, I get to the conference venue an.d find that registration includes picking up your delegate bag which is no ordinary bag…my delegate bag is filled with some goodies…AIDS 2008 branded condoms, a USB pen, a really cute condom bag (which I think will serve other purposes) and the BIGGEST programme books I have ever seen! This programme book is about the size and thickness of 5 version of Tolstoy’s War and Peace. To make things worse I have to pick up two delegate bags, one for myself and our Executive Director who is arriving in Mexico several days later. So there I am lugging 4 suitcases around Centro Banamex looking very un-like Carrie. To make matters worse I find out that my laptop is not working and I do not have the right adaptor for Mexico. I am also showing my ‘johnny just come’ nature to season conference attendees who are travelling lightly. Over lunch I get chatting to some comrades from the Carribean and for some reason the issue of me carrying two delegate bags comes up. ‘Oh but I had to pick up my ED’s bag, she doesn’t get here till the 5th’ I respond. ‘How many times have you attended this conference’ queries Ms Carribean. ‘This is my first time’. ‘That’s why, in future you won’t pick up any bags for your colleague…’
Fast forward to the pre-conference satellite session organised by the International AIDS Women Caucus where I hear the inspirational Stephen Lewis ( I blogged about his address earlier) who is also a huge supporter and donor to AWDF’s HIV/AIDS fund. Some of the panel speakers include Nyaradzayi Gumbovonda, Secretary General of the World YWCA, Purnima Mane, Deputy Executive Director (Programmes), UNFPA, Allesandro Nilo, Justice Works, Susan Sippel, Elizabeth Maguire, President and CEO of IPAS, Meena Saraswathi Seshu and Neelanjana Mukhia from ActionAid International. I am particularly inspired by Nyaradzayi ( the world YWCA is also a grantee partner of AWDF) who speaks about the feminisation of the AIDS epidemic in Africa and the need to recognise the faces behind the epidemic and not just think in terms of statistics. Susan shares her personal testimony as a person living positively and the lack of space for women to claim their sexual and reproductive rights. Neelanjana talks about the women won’t wait campaign and Meena probably gives me the most food for thought on ‘Sex work, HIV/AIDS and Human Rights’. The case Meena appears to be making is that it is wrong for feminists to treat all sex workers as victims and that adult sex workers should be treated as workers and accorded the same rights that all other workers are entitled too’. Now as a feminist who has read Andrea Dworkin, who has real issues with porn (apart from the new female friendly ones), who thinks that no one out of their own free will chooses to work in the sex industry I really struggle to accept that some women will choose to be sex workers (apart from the new crop of elite sex workers I have read about in magazines like Marie Claire who charge £5,000 per session). So the question I posed to Meena in the Q&A session is that ‘Why will any woman freely choose to be a sex worker?’ Her paraphrased response is that as adults sex workers have the right to make their own choices. I agree with the principle of human beings having the right to make their own choices and I agree with Meena that it is wrong for the police and military to brutalise sex workers. I also agree that sex work should not be criminalised. However I have a real struggle trying to accept that some adults freely choose to be sex work. One of the great things that I have seen at the IAC are poster exhibitions telling the stories of various people living with HIV. Many of these posters have featured people who were sexually abused, raped, infected with HIV and had no choice but to turn to sex work for survival. The question I ask myself is that ‘having become a sex worker, should the emphasis be on giving you skills, education and resources to pursue an alternate career or should you be given workers rights’? What are your thoughts?

Nana Sekyiamah
Programme Officer
Fundraising & Communications

I attended a workshop two days ago which was organised to disseminate details on a study of Trokosi practice in Ghana conducted by researchers from the University of Legon, Ghana. Tro means deity and kosi means slave or wife so Trokosi translates as slave or wife of the deity. The practice of Trokosi involves holding young girls in servitude to appease the deities whom their families have offended. The most useful parts of the workshop was the personal testimony of an ex Trokosi and the dissemination of research on the current state of the trokosi system in Ghana. I will share below Mercy’s testimony as given by her interpreter.

Mercy was 8 years old when she attended a festival with her parents. At the festival she kept approaching her parents, in particular her Mum who kept pushing her away. Other young people at the festival said to her ‘You are being taken to a place where you can’t see your parents anymore’ so Mercy hid in the bushes until nightfall and then ran back home. Her parents and grandparents were very angry when she returned and took her across the river where she was dressed up in beads. When she cried she was told ‘You don’t weep here’. At night she was given a mat to sleep on and in the morning woken up at dawn and given work to do. She was told that from now on this will be your job. Mercy’s job involved cleaning the shrine and surrounding areas. She was scared but had no choice but to do the work she had been assigned.

Mercy has been given no reason as to why she had been taken to the shrine. After persistently asking she was told that her grandmother stole an ear ring from a Trokosi who had passed through her house and because she refused to confess, had been reported to two shrines. For retribution Mercy’s Aunt was taken to one shrine and her sister was taken to the other shrine. When her Aunt died Mercy was sent as a replacement.

The Trokosi system in practised in the Ewe and Dangme areas of South East Ghana and is believed to have originated in the 16th or 17th century. Some of the early reports include a report in 1919 by Daniel Nyagbledzi of Baitor Agbetikpo to the Colonial Secretary of Native Affairs calling for a ban on the practice. Some of the difficulties described by the researchers included the secrecy shrouding the practice, the fear of victims that the gods will punish and kill traitors who disclose information to outsiders and the complementary roles of the gods and the priests. Priests were in the most cases extremely reluctant to speak about the practice and would refer the researchers to the Afrikania Movement (an organisation supportive of the Trokosi practice).

The most disturbing detail is that although the Trokosi system, alongside all traditional and cultural practices that violate the constitution of Ghana was banned in 1998 the practice is still very much alive. In some cases the practice has moved ‘underground’. Some members of the communities involved do not see Trokosi as a Human Rights violation but as a traditional and reliable way of dispensing and maintaining social justice. The researchers estimated the number of victims to be roundabout 1400. To date no one has been arrested or persecuted in spite of the law banning the practice.

From 2002, AWDF has supported the Ative Vocational Centre, an organisation founded by ex Trokosis. Support has included training in income generation activities including bead-making and the building of a permanent structure for the centre which includes units for dressmaking, soap making and hairdressing

Nana Sekyiamah
Programme Officer
Fundraising & Communications

Until recently I thought “wife beating” occurred mainly in rural communities amongst illiterate folks and not in urban areas like Accra.

The whole neighbourhood of Nyaniba Estate was deprived of their sleep last night when a scream of a little girl woke us all up, ‘daddy stop, daddy stop!!!!’ was all we kept hearing. As happens in many Ghanaian communities, people both young and old rushed out of their beds, some with towels tied around their waist, others wearing boxer shorts, others with “wrappers”, managed to find their way to the house where the crying was coming from.

The Mrs. of the house was half naked with blood on her body and with puffy eyes. According to the male perpetrator, his wife’s phone rang at about 1.30 am and she picked up the phone to speak with the caller when her husband asked who the caller was, the woman said ‘I will tell you in the morning’. Out of anger the man decided to put his muscles to the test by beating his wife.

My worry and confusion is that this is a well known and ‘respected’ man in society. The personal should be political; we must hold our leaders accountable for their personal lives as well. Our homes are full of ‘boxers’ and lions as husbands. Yet on Monday morning these same men are well dressed in the best of suits and ties. Are these the kind of Managers, Directors and Executives we work with? Mercy Lord!!!!!

So after last night’s incident, I tried to link ‘girlhood’ to womanhood. Is beating and suffering part of womanhood. As a child you were beaten for the slightest mistake. At that stage all you want to do is grow and become an adult, little did you know that even as an adult woman in Africa beating is possible?

All who still think like I used to, that wife beating is the preserve of the ‘illiterate’ should sleep with an ear open and I am sure will hear a cry of another woman being beaten.

We should as young women, be able to smell an abusive relationship a mile away before we get entangled into marriage with partners who may be potentially violent.

Hilda Gorluuh
Programme Assistant
Grants Department, AWDF

On the 18th of June, AWDF held its very first book club meeting for staff. This was an informal gathering of staff whom convened to discuss the topic of women global leaders. Each woman shared their stories from books they individually read which related to the topic of global female leaders. I enjoyed listening to the accounts of each woman’s stories. I myself do not have such a vast collection of African female authors, so after today’s meeting, I became more inspired to seek such authors and genre’s of books. I personally believe that having this sort of informal meeting is a really good way to have a forum where women can not only learn about the contributions and effects of other women, but engage discussion on issues African women face.

One recommendation I would have in order to promote a dialogue that brings into conversation the international shared struggle amongst women would be to incorporate the stories of women across the different continents. Often I’ve observed that within the women’s movement there are so many varying efforts to unite one certain group of women’s causes and then another’s. These efforts are very disconnected in the sense that women are not united so not all women are listening to the other group of women’s distresses or issues which need attention. As a result, I would provide the recommendation of looking into other women authors from around the world who speak of their respective struggles in order to generate a different approach towards issues talked about when discussing women’s rights and how to attain what the women’s rights movement is established to attain. I like the atmosphere of meetings like these and I look forward to more.

I had a few couple of favorites amongst the titles discussed. I am expecially keen on reading “Heart of Fire”, Unbowed”, “Left to tell”, “Aman story of a Somalian girl”, “The Struggle of Winnie Mandela” and many more! Unfortunately, I couldn’t make it to the meeting comprised of women under 25 who met this week to discuss the millennium goals but I will try to make it to the next meeting.

Hawwa Muhammad
Political Science, Rutgers University ’09
AWDF intern

I recently read Wangari Maathai’s autobiography Unbowed in preparation for AWDF’s first book club meeting which will be held this Friday and my immediate reaction is Wow! The story of Wangari is truly an inspirational one. Wangari makes me want to go out, challenge the politicians about corruption and get thrown in jail for my efforts. Okay, not quite like that but that is what she did time and time again in her promotion of green belts across Kenya and other parts of the world. The key message for me in Wangari’s autobiography is that individuals can make a difference. I just visited the Green Belt Movement’s website and Green Belt Movement Kenya has participated in planting more than 30 million trees! Now that’s a legacy that anyone would be proud to leave behind.

In my opinion there are many lessons that young women can take from Wangari’s autobiography. (When I talk of young women I generally mean women aged 20 – 30) I am hoping that if women critically consider some of these issues at an early age it will prevent unnecessary heartache, pain and regrets in the future.

When Wangari got married her husband’s family expected her to take her husband’s name. Although she was initially against the idea, she capitulated. In her own words:

‘The practice of using the title ‘Mrs.’ after marriage, followed by the husband’s surname, was introduced by the British and I didn’t see why I had to adopt it. True that is what everybody else in the emerging elite class did, and not doing it seemed to suggest that I did not quite love Mwangi and his family. Largely to demonstrate that this was not the case, I agreed, but put a hyphen between the two surnames. Eventually I stopped using the hyphen and even dropped my maiden name for day-to-day correspondence.’

Can you imagine that after changing her name for her husband, joining him on the campaign trail in order to fulfil his political ambitions and performing all those other duties that ‘good African’ women perform for their husbands he has the nerve to ask her to change his name when they get divorced. Now, I don’t even want to get started on the divorce…he petitioned for divorce (I suggest you read Unbowed for the whole story). I could really identify with Wangari not wanting to change her name when she got married. I had faced the same pressure to change my name when I got married (I’m no longer married by the way) but I refused to change my name. My Dad when he used to ring me would call me Mrs x, I think he just did that to annoy me, and I would have to say ‘Daddy please don’t call me Mrs x’. Well reading Unbowed reminded me of that time in my life. I thought to myself that ‘Thank goodness, I did not change my name when I got married, I would have had to un change it or even worse stick with the name of a man I am no longer married to’. Actually before I got married I did think of all those things. ‘What if I get married 5 times? I will have to change my name 5 different times’. You are probably now thinking my marriage was doomed to failure…So for me the issue of taking your husband’s name if you get married is a serious one. What’s my advice? Well, I’m sure you can guess…One of the things which really impressed me about Maathai was how she bounced back from any setback which befell her. One of her favourite quotes appears to be ‘In every cloud there is a silver lining’ so when she received a letter from her husband’s lawyers asking her to change her name she did…she changed her name from Mathai to Maathai.

The other critical issue that for me is highlighted in Unbowed is ensuring that your name is on the legal documentation for any property or any other investment you may secure in partnership with your husband, or anyone else for that matter. Wangari and her husband bought property together however the property was in his name which meant that post divorce she could not claim any right to in. I think it is easy to think these issues do not matter when you are in love and all is well in your relationships but who knows what the future holds?

All in all Unbowed for me has been a fantastic read and Wangari Maathai now joins my list of female heroines and inspirational role models.

Nana Sekyiamah
Programme Officer
Fundraising & Communications

I had settled in to the flight from Entebbe to Nairobi on Monday June 30th , feeling a bit sorry for myself. I had to catch the 5am flight out of Entebbe, which meant leaving Kampala for Entebbe at 3am which in turn meant I got no sleep. The flight attendant offered us some local papers, so I picked out the day’s edition of the Ugandan national daily, The New Vision. There it was on the front page, ‘Mother cuts off defiler’s penis’. By the time I finished the story, my spirits were up and I have been in a great mood ever since.

According to the newspaper report, Angelina Kyomugisha from Rugyerera village in Kashari County, Mbarara district, Uganda, was weeding her banana farm, when she heard her 10 year old daughter cry out. The cries persisted, and she went over to have a look, only to find 40 year old Geoffrey Mugarura ‘defiling’ her little girl. Angelina took this horrifying scene in, and proceeded to do what every mother in the world ought to do if they find themselves in her situation – she pounced on Geoffrey and promptly cut off his penis. Just like that. Then she flung it as far as she could into the bush.

Geoffrey howled, till neighbours appeared to find out what the fuss was all about. They then proceeded to help search for his severed penis, till one of them noticed a dog running off with something in its mouth. They threw a stick at the dog till it dropped what was left of his snack. At this point in the story I was laughing so hard I had to control myself for fear being thrown off the flight for being a nuisance. The helpful neighbours then rushed Geoffrey to the hospital for treatment. One of the doctors who treated Geoffrey was able to confirm that they would refashion what was left of his penis so that he could at least urinate with it. As for any other business, well, the dog had taken care of that.

When I got back to Accra, I called my Ugandan sister Solome Nakaweesi-Kimbugwe of Akina Mama wa Afrika, to confirm the story. She told me that the Federation of Women Lawyers of Uganda (FIDA-Uganda) have sent a delegation to see what kind of support the mother needs, and they will be handling her case. Women in Uganda have been talking about this non-stop since the news broke on Monday morning. The verdict is unanimous – if men do not get the message that the bodies of women and girls are not as accessible and disposable as toilet paper, they will learn the hard way.

The woman who I will now call Mother of the Year, Angelina Kyomugisha, probably never attended the UN’s Conference on Women in Beijing, 1995. She has probably never heard of the Africa Protocol on Women’s Rights or the Solemn Declaration on Gender Equality in Africa, ratified by the African Union. She might not know that Ugandan women’s rights activists have been trying to get a Domestic Relations Bill passed for over ten years now. Angelina might have known that in Uganda, defilement of children carries the death penalty, but she definitely has never heard of anyone paying such a harsh price for ruining the life of a child. It is however certain that Angelina would have heard stories of the hundreds of girls raped and even killed on a regular basis by relatives, acquaintances and neighbours. She would have known about how much these poor girls and their parents suffer at the hands of local law enforcement officers, the judiciary, their families and the community at large. She would have been familiar with what a friend of mine, Toyin Mejuini who runs Women Against Rape, Sexual Harassment and Exploitation (WARSHE) in Nigeria calls the ‘Rape and beg’ phenomenon.

What is ‘Rape and Beg’? This is what they call the many powerful delegations they send to intimidate parents, especially mothers of young women and girls who have been victims of violent sexual abuse. These ‘Rape and beg’ delegations usually include local elders, traditional rulers, clergy, respected opinion leaders, and even senior members of the family. If the parents still insist on pursuing the matter, they simply face other obstacles with the legal and law enforcement system till the victims are victimised all over again.

Angelina might not have known much about all the guarantees African governments committed themselves to at the conferences in Vienna, Beijing, Addis Ababa, and other places, and all the promises they made to promote and protect women’s human rights and bodily integrity, but she definitely knew about ‘Rape and Beg’. And she was not about to be begged. She was not going to wait for the creaky wheels of justice to slowly crank into action and run out of gas. She was not about to be told how to be a good mother and member of the community, and not wash their dirty linen in public. Angelina took one look at the monster standing over her daughter and decided, ‘this will be the last time you do this to any girl’.

So what if we are asked, ‘Was it right for Angelina to take the law into her own hands’? The politically correct answer is No, but this time, permit us to say a resounding Yes! Our colleagues at Action Aid have launched an international anti-violence campaign called ‘Women Won’t Wait’. Angelina has definitely heeded that call. She has decided not to wait. Angelina has sent out a message, loud and clear, which we hope will be heard way beyond the shores of Uganda’s Lake Victoria, ‘Stop abusing and killing our children. Stop violating women. Stop the culture of impunity. Protect women and girls from violence’. Since domestic violence laws, conferences, workshops, rallies, popular theatre, and protests have not managed to drive the message home effectively enough, perhaps the thought of the wretched Geoffrey’s penis in the mouth of a fleeing dog will do the trick. Enough is Enough.

Contrary to some ill-informed allegations that have made the rounds over the years, feminists are not calling for the castration or emasculation of men. Our position is a lot simpler than that. If men decide to use certain parts of their anatomy as weapons of mass destruction to wage wars on the bodies of women and girls, they will be disarmed and demobilised. Period.

Now, for those of you who are mothers or guardians of young girls, it might not be a bad idea to keep something sharp handy, you never know. And make sure you take time out to pat a dog over the coming days. One of their brethren in Uganda has done a great job.

Bisi Adeleye-Fayemi
Executive Director
African Women’s Development Fund